Love or Lust?

How to Discern Them? - Page 2

Love or Lust - How to Tell

So, how to tell if the feeling of attraction that we feel is love or lust? Here are few tips to discern them.

• It's lust if:(although all these apply to both sexes, some might be more applicable to men regarding bigger capacity in men to have sex without bond)
  
  
  • What interests you is only her looks and body.
  
  
  • You're already fantasizing about seeing her naked and/or having sex with him/her.
  
  
  • You have no interest in anything she has to say.
  
  
  • You don't enjoy being with her without sex.
  
  
  • If, for some circumstances, you can't have sex with him/her, you fantasize having sex with other partner.
  
  
  • You try to find every excuse to not meet her and/or spend time with her if you know that in that meeting you won't get sex.
  
  
  • She's your booty call: you call her for sex at midnight after having fun with your buddies.
  
  
  • Love or lust? If after sex you look for every excuses to leave as soon as the situation permits, then it is lust!
  
  
  • He demands sex from you. And if you don't give it, he threatens you (subtly or blatantly) to end the relationship.
  
  
  • He takes chances over your expenses.
  
  
  • He estranges himself from you if you're no longer willing to satisfy his sexual desires.
  
  
  • He becomes suspicious and jealous if he sees you with other guy. It is because, unlike love, lust knows no trust.
  
  
  • He doesn't really care if you're happy or not. As long as his desires met, he doesn't give a damn to anything else.
  
  
  • He rarely shows his respect to you. Only when he needs you to satisfy him he may show a little respect.
  
  
  • You slept together for the first time on the first date, or very shortly after that.
  
  




• And it's love if:
  
  
  • You enjoy your conversation with her very much so that hours pass like minutes and minutes like seconds. You enjoy listening to whatever she has to say.
  • You always want to be with her, to spend time with her.
  
  
  • Love or lust can also be seen from how you make your plans. If you love her, you will include her in your plans. Either they are long span future plans, or just a simple one such as going to the library tomorrow. If you love her, you will want her to be there in your plan.
  
  
  • You find her beautiful even when you find her just woke up from her sleep without makeup.
  
  
  • You can't imagine your life without her. You even find yourself thinking about marrying her.
  
  
  • You become more romantic. You listen to more romantic songs and even tried to make your own love poems
  
  
  • You introduce her to your family and the ones that are close to you. You will also want to get to know more about her beloved ones.
  
  
  • Knowing her and being close to her make you want to be a better person than you are now.
  
  
  • You always take on her side. When somebody talks bad about her, you will immediately rise to defend her.
  
  
  • Love or lust? Like lust, love also knows jealousy. You might feel jealous sometimes. But even when you feel it, you know that she will not betray your trust.
  
  
  • You feel secure with her, more than with anybody else.
  
  
  • Nothing else can make you feel more serene as when you and she together.
  
  
  • When you fight with her, it won't last long to make up. Both of you know that nothing is more important than being able to express each true feelings, even if it can ignite conflict.
  
  
  • Neither you or she ever feel the need to test each other loyalties.
  
  
  • Sex may or may not be part of the relationship. But even if it is, it is committed by mutual desire and agreement without the slightest hint of threat or oppression.
  
  
  • Love or lust can also be seen in this: Unless there are very strong reasons for it, you never think of demanding her to choose between you and her family/friends. You know, she will always choose you if it is needed without you have to ask her for it.
  
  
  • You respect her and always want the best for her.
  
  
  • You can forget relatively easily her wrong doings to you.
  
  

Okay, that's all the signs that I can tell you about how to differentiate if it is love or lust. But remember, they're only signs, indications. The more of the signs you see, the bigger the chances if it is love or lust.

But because love and lust are closely intertwined, where lust to some degree always included in love, it's very likely you will find mixed signals.

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